Why do we write new year's resolutions? To analyze complex notions into simpler ones, to solve problems, to determine what is worthy of our pursuit, what to stay away from, and to narrow our focus. Most of us write resolutions to give us an opportunity to retell ourselves at the end of the year how much we have achieved so we don’t feel like a failure.
This is a story we have been told repeatedly. Set goals, set clear goals in life, the key to success is to have a clear goal written down and work towards it every day while this methodology has worked for many people it's vastly a root cause of unhappiness for those who do not achieve those goals and sometimes for those who achieve it. Because a goal is the end of the exertion of energy.
If you set a goal to lose weight, it is very achievable, but maintaining a healthy lifestyle requires more than a goal, it requires an objective. Example My goal to avoid burgers is different from setting an objective to eat healthily. Instead of avoiding burgers as your goal, you look for healthy options as your objective one is very strict and restrictive the other is very approachable.
Because when they do commercials, it is repeated until we ingrain it in our minds and thinking, I will do another example of goal and objective. For example, setting a goal to lose 3lbs a week versus an objective to dance three times a week, if you love dancing is better than saying you would lose 3lbs a week working out when you hate working out. Goals can be very restrictive and sometimes avoidants focus, rather than exciting and approachable.
Without goal setting you can’t build toward a future; you want a myth. You don’t achieve success accidentally for sure, but there is no goal to building a successful life because reaching a goal is the penalty you pay for setting one. There is an objective without limitation to build a successive life, and you can set goals to note when you get to a milestone.
An African proverb says, “You can only go as far as you can see.” So, it’s important to write down your vision or visualize your thinking. I want to be successful is not visual enough for your brain to make inroads. I say go further, ask yourself what success looks like, smells like, tastes like, where would you be when you are successful, who would be there with you, and how you want to feel about it.
Instead of writing a resolution, why not write a new story and give yourselves permission to break from the pattern you have considered to be your origin story?
Note: It’s easier at the beginning of the year to do this simple exercise. The most important part of creating a resolution is making it fun and knowing you at least have a sense of direction for where you are going in the New Year.
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